How to finger a woman?

We will guide you through nine steps on how to stimulate the genitals using your fingers.

Fingering is one of the most colloquial ways to talk about masturbation of the clitoris, vagina, vulva or anus with fingers.

What is Fingering?

Let's clarify what fingering means before we discuss techniques. Fingering refers to using your fingers to stimulate your partner's genitals. This can involve external stimulation of the clitoris, internal vaginal stimulation, or a combination of both. It's also worth mentioning that anal stimulation can be included, but we'll focus on that later.

When it comes to stimulating a partner's vulva or vagina, fingers can be a great tool. Unlike toys or a penis, fingers offer more control and sensitivity. They are packed with nerve endings, allowing you to navigate and touch vulvas in specific ways.

It's important to note that every vulva is unique, and there isn't a one-size-fits-all approach to fingering. However, there are some general tips that can help you enhance your partner's pleasure. These pointers can guide you as you take your partner's pleasure into your own hands.

How to Finger a Women Step by Step?

Ready to learn how to finger? Let's go with the 9 steps you must learn to do good fingering:

1. Ask Your Partner What They Like

Initiating a conversation about desires and boundaries before starting can be highly beneficial. Even in a long-term relationship, your partner's preferences and sensations may vary from day to day.

It's crucial to maintain open communication during the sexual encounter as well. Let your partner know that their feedback is welcome and encouraged. Express your enthusiasm for exploring and discovering how their body responds to different touches and sensations.

2. A comfortable posture

The ideal position for fingering is often lying down. This position offers comfort for both partners and allows for better access and control during stimulation. Additionally, using a cushion or pillow under the lower back can provide added support and elevation to the pelvis, enhancing the overall stimulation.

By elevating the pelvis with a cushion, you can create a more favorable angle and alignment, making it easier to reach and stimulate the desired areas. It can also help reduce strain or discomfort for the person receiving the stimulation.

3. The skin, the forgotten sexual organ

The skin is indeed the largest sexual organ in the human body and is highly sensitive due to the abundance of nerve endings. Touching yourself or being touched sensually can be extremely stimulating and pleasurable.

Taking a gradual and sensual approach to touching, starting from areas away from the genitals and gradually moving closer, can build anticipation and heighten excitement. Engaging in a slow and deliberate touch allows you to explore and discover what feels pleasurable for you or your partner.

4. Massage on the vulva

Place your hands on your hips and massage your groin from top to bottom with your fingers. You can use a massage oil or water-based lubricant to increase the sensations.

Run your fingers over the labia majora of the vulva, making a circle. Little by little, with the tips of your fingers, stroke the labia minora from top to bottom.

5. Without hurry but without pause

Once you've stimulated the skin, labia majora, and labia minora of the vulva, gently caress the hood covering the clitoris. Use the tips of your fingers to make circular motions in a clockwise direction, enhancing pleasure. As time progresses, you can apply the same technique at the entrance of the vagina, gradually and carefully inserting the tip of your finger. Remember to prioritize your partner's comfort and pleasure throughout the experience.

6. The combination of movements is the key

As arousal builds, gently insert your index and/or middle finger into the vagina. Start with one finger and gradually add more if desired. Use circular motions at the entrance of the vagina, while simultaneously stimulating the clitoris for heightened pleasure. Enjoy exploring these techniques to create a pleasurable experience.

7. Come here, darling

Once both fingers are inside the vagina and you have been making circles for a while, you can change movements. Specifically, you can do the 'come here' movement, which consists of inserting your fingers curled with the palm of your hand facing up and making the 'come here' movement.

The goal is to touch the anterior wall of the vagina, where the G zone is located, which is about 3 or 5 centimeters from the vaginal entrance and has a texture like that of the palate.

8. Building Pleasure: Fingering in Crescendo

Finding the right rhythm, intensity, and pressure for pleasure and reaching orgasm varies for everyone. The key to successful fingering is to gradually increase the movements in line with stimulation and excitement. Pay attention to your partner's breathing and lubrication as indicators of their arousal. And, of course, open communication is essential—don't hesitate to ask for feedback to ensure a satisfying experience for both of you.

9. Incorporate toys for added excitement.

Try using a clitoral vibrator alongside G-spot stimulation for a powerful combination. Alternatively, explore the sensation of a sucking toy on the clitoris while focusing on the G-spot manually. If multitasking feels overwhelming, let your partner handle the clitoral vibrator while you concentrate on the G-spot. For deeper internal vibration, consider using a G-spot wand while simultaneously stimulating the clitoris. Embrace the pleasure of combining manual techniques with the unique sensation's toys can provide....


While following these steps can greatly improve your fingering technique, it's crucial not to take them as strict rules. The most important aspect of masturbation and pleasuring a partner is communication. Each body is unique and requires different approaches to fingering. Always prioritize open communication to understand and fulfill your partner's desires and preferences. Let their guidance be your compass on this intimate journey of pleasure.

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