How to use a remote vibrator as a couple?

Exploring intimate experiences with the use of various positions and toys, engaging in mutual pleasure through shared moments with a remote vibrator—let's break free from the misconception that vibrators are solely for individual use.

Gone are the days of viewing sex toys as a solitary endeavor. Embrace the notion that these intimate tools are meant for shared enjoyment. Consider it a must-try adventure for both partners, an exploration that adds a new dimension to your connection—one that goes beyond the ordinary.

Embarking on the journey of incorporating sex toys into your shared space is an exhilarating experience. It involves harnessing the advancements in technology to elevate not only your own pleasure but that of your partner, reaching heights of satisfaction that may have seemed unimaginable.

To kickstart this journey, we present a fundamental guide for seamlessly integrating sex toys into your intimate moments with your partner:

• Opening the conversation

When broaching the topic of vibrators with your partner, it's helpful to start with a casual mention to gauge their initial reaction. You can seamlessly integrate it into conversation by referencing a scene from a movie, something a friend shared, or even a recent article you came across. Vibrators and sex toys, in general, are increasingly common interests, and societal taboos surrounding them are fading, making it likely that your partner might be intrigued as well.

However, if you're unsure about your partner's immediate receptiveness, consider framing the discussion with these perspectives:

• Normalizing the Use:

Contrary to any perception that using a vibrator during sex is reserved for niche interests, it's important to highlight that a significant number of couples are incorporating toys into their sex lives. In fact, a study from the University of Indiana found that 53% of women and 50% of men reported using a vibrator during sex nearly a decade ago. It's a widely embraced practice that enhances pleasure for many.

• Enhancement, Not Replication:

Emphasize that a vibrator is not a replication or replacement for a partner. As sexologist Alicia Sinclair aptly puts it, "Toys are sexual enhancements, like chocolate sauce or sprinkles on ice cream." Vibrators come in various non-phallic shapes and sizes, catering to diverse preferences and desires.

• Shared Pleasure:

Challenge the common misconception that vibrators are exclusively associated with women's use. Highlight the numerous ways in which both partners can derive pleasure from incorporating a vibrator into their sex life. It's not limited to any gender and can add a new dimension to the shared experience.

• Normalizing Sexual Tools:

Draw parallels with other elements commonly accepted in sexual exploration, such as the use of lube or engaging in dirty talk. Positioning a vibrator as just another tool in the toolkit of things that enhance pleasure helps normalize its inclusion in your sexual repertoire.

• Addressing the Orgasm Gap:

Acknowledge the reality of the orgasm gap, where heterosexual men tend to orgasm more consistently than heterosexual women during sex. Highlight that integrating a vibrator into your sexual encounters significantly increases the likelihood of mutual orgasm, potentially bringing both partners to climax together.

What if your partner isn't receptive?

Encountering resistance from a partner regarding the introduction of a vibrator requires a thoughtful and understanding approach. Here's how to navigate such a situation:

• Understanding the Aversion:

If your partner is hesitant or averse to trying a vibrator, it's crucial to explore the root cause. Be open and communicative, creating a space where they feel comfortable sharing their feelings. This aversion might stem from past trauma, societal stigmas, fear of sexual inadequacy, or personal insecurities.

• Identifying Relationship Dynamics:

If the aversion is tied to judgment or a belief that pleasure should only come from physical intimacy with them, it may indicate deeper issues in the relationship or within the individual. Addressing these concerns is essential for fostering a healthy and open sexual dynamic.

• Introducing Discreet Options:

Recognize that some individuals may be more receptive to discreet options as a gradual introduction to sex toys. Suggesting a vibrating cock ring, for instance, can offer clitoral stimulation for one partner while allowing the other to engage in penetrative sex. Brands like We-Vibe specialize in couple's sex toys, facilitating shared enjoyment of vibrations.

• Respecting Boundaries:

Emphasize the importance of mutual comfort and pleasure in the relationship. If your partner remains closed off to the idea, it's vital to respect their boundaries. However, if their resistance becomes a hindrance to your sexual fulfillment and well-being, it may be worth discussing how both partners can find common ground.

• Setting Boundaries for Yourself:

Understand that your desires and interests are valid. If your partner's discomfort makes you feel wrong or uncomfortable, it's essential to prioritize your own needs. No one should make you feel ashamed or judged for expressing your desire to explore new facets of intimacy.

• Unexpected Desires:

If your partner expresses interest in more advanced options like strap-ons or anal plugs, approach the conversation with the same openness you hoped for when introducing the topic of vibrators. Honest communication about desires and boundaries is crucial for maintaining trust and understanding in the relationship.

Exploring Vibrator Shopping Together:

If your partner is new to the world of vibrators, shopping for one together can be an enlightening and enjoyable experience. Even if they are already comfortable with the idea, joint shopping adds an element of shared exploration. Here's how to make the experience both educational and fun:

• Educational Opportunity:

For a partner less familiar with vibrators, this shopping endeavor becomes an educational opportunity. Take the time to explore various shapes, sizes, and functionalities. Discuss the different modes of stimulation available and consider what might be most appealing to both of you.

• Fun and Enjoyable:

If your partner is already at ease with the idea of using vibrators, shopping together becomes a delightful and bonding experience. It's an opportunity to express preferences, share fantasies, and ultimately choose a toy that suits both your desires.

• Explore In-Store or Online:

Decide whether you want to shop in a physical retail store, such as Babeland, or prefer the convenience of online browsing. Each option has its merits, so choose what aligns with your comfort levels and preferences.

• Variety of Shapes and Sizes:

Ensure you explore a diverse range of vibrator shapes and sizes. Consider the versatility of stimulation modes offered by different models. This exploration allows you to tailor your choice to both partners' preferences and comfort levels.

• Consider the Setting:

Discuss where and how you envision using the vibrator. Do you need a discreet option, or are you both looking for something more daring and adventurous? Factor in your comfort levels and desired level of intimacy.

• Hot Tip for Intensity:

To gauge the intensity of vibrations in different areas, try holding the vibrator against the point of your nose. This can serve as a useful indicator of how the vibrations might feel in other places, enhancing your decision-making process.

1. Choose your ideal remote vibrator

While it may not be a necessity, consider the possibility that either you or your partner may already own a toy. However, if that's not the case, shopping for a toy as a couple can be an incredibly sexy experience. You can comfortably browse through the various options available in the Touch Honey online store, imagining how each one can be used.

As you explore the choices, envision and create scenarios for how you both might use the selected toy. You'll likely find yourselves sharing many kisses that same day. Additionally, with a remote vibrator, you can tantalize your partner from across the bed, the couch, or even in public places.

2. Prepare the session and don't go straight to the point

Understanding that an aroused body is more receptive to pleasure is crucial. Therefore, don't underestimate the importance of what is often referred to as "foreplay." Focus on lingering in each moment, especially on kisses and exploring their entire body, rather than rushing straight to the genitals. Extend and savor each moment. Once both of you are thoroughly aroused, it's time to introduce the sex toy you've chosen.

3. I lubricate myself, therefore I am

Lubricant, as we consistently emphasize, is indispensable in your sexual experiences, and the same goes for sex toys. A properly lubricated sex toy enhances its ability to provide pleasure. Therefore, ensure you apply a few drops of lube to your toy, spreading it evenly to ensure smooth movement across your body.

 

You can also apply the lubricant to your hands or directly to your genitals before engaging with the sex toy, enhancing the overall experience.

4. Go little by little

Start playing with the toy around your partner's pleasure zones, don't go straight to the point, since you don't know how he or she may react to the vibrations. Through small approaches, we generate excitement and expectation, so now we can reach the long-awaited place, where your partner will writhe and scream with great pleasure.

5. Listen and communicate with your partner:

When stimulating the clitoris, avoid a rapid DJ-like approach. If you're engaging with a penis, steer clear of a technique resembling choking a duck. If you're focusing on the G-spot, don't treat it like pressing an elevator button. Instead, communicate with your partner and gradually reach a consensus on the movements they find most pleasurable. Avoid making assumptions, and especially refrain from replicating what you see in pornography.

 

The same principle applies to using a sex toy—there's no one-size-fits-all approach, only effective communication.